Rock N Roll McDonald's!

So Bethy did this. A little while ago. And now I'm copying the idea. Sorry my first blog in like six months isn't all that original... Oh well!! Here you go!

1. If someone says, “Is this ok?” you say:
   Sleep On (Alison Krauss) - heck yeah! Ignore the problem, it will go away, right?
   
2. What would best describe your personality?
   She’s Always a Woman (Billy Joel) - OK, as long as they don't mean in a needy emotional kind of way.
   
3. What do you like in a guy/girl?
   What a Girl Wants (Christina Aguilera) - But that's still kind of vague...
   
4. How do you feel today?
   Master Blaster (Jammin’) (Stevie Wonder) - On a Sunday? You know it!
   
5. What is your life’s purpose?
   Where is the Love? (Black-Eyed Peas & JT) - My list got all screwed up, so I had to fudge on this one a little. But I think it works.
   
6. What is your motto?
   I Gotta Find Peace of Mind (Lauryn Hill) - Sing it, L-boogie.
   
7. What do your friends think of you?
   We Can Work It Out (Stevie Wonder) - Stevie, you're such an optimist, and we're with ya, man.
   
8. What do you think of your parents?
   Speed of Sound (Coldplay) - I don't get this one.
   
9. What do you think about very often?
   There is None Like You (Watermark) - That song is about Jesus, so yeah that'll work.
   
10. What’s 2 + 2?
    New (Bethany Dillon) - As in, a brand new set of four!
    
11. What do you think of your best friend?
    We Belong (Pat Benatar) - I don't even know who my best friend would be, so I like the use of "we" here.
    
12. What do you think of the person you like?
    Little Good-byes (SheDaisy) - Now that's just depressing.
    
13. What is your life story?
    All That Noise (Dave Barnes) - The last couple of weeks? Yes.
    
14. What do you want to be when you grow up?
    Help Me If You Can (Roman Candle) - Sounds like a person who needs some direction. Sounds like me.
    
15. What do you think when you see the person you like?
    Beautiful (Bethany Dillon) - Awww, yay!
    
16. What do your parents think of you?
    Make Believe Jesus (Shane & Shane) - The song has a different message than the title implies, so I'm gonna say this works.
    
17. What will you dance to at your wedding?
    Be Near Me (Bethany Dillon) - That's cool. Not really a wedding song, but the title works well here.
    
18. What will they play at your funeral?
    Befriended (Stephanie Cuomo) - That'd be nice, too.
    
19. What is your hobby/interest?
    Miles to Go (Dave Barnes) - Now I know they don't mean running--hahahahaha, that's a laugh.
    
20. What do you think of your friends?
    Twelve Days of Christmas (The UGA Accidentals, which is a men's a capella group) - So remember, friends, my favorite color is green.
    
21. What’s the worst thing that could happen?
    Love You Down (INOJ) - No comment. I could only get myself in trouble here.
    
22. How will you die?
    Simple As It Should Be (Tristan Prettyman) - Well, all right then.
    
23. What is the one thing you regret?
    What This Woman Needs (SheDaisy)
    
24. What makes you laugh?
    Holiday (Shane & Shane) - I guess from all of the obvious merriment.
    
25. What makes you cry?
    Wesley, why? (Matt Wertz) - Seriously, why did you do that, Wes? Geez...
    
26. Will you ever get married?
    Someday, Sarah (Dave Barnes) - Is Sarah asking me all of these questions?
    
27. What scares you the most?
    Adia (Sarah McLachlan) - The lyrics say, "Adia, I do believe I failed you/Adia, I know I've let you down..." And it's all melancholy and stuff, so maybe Adia's reaction will be scary.
    
28. Does anyone like you?
    Isn't She Lovely (Stevie Wonder) - Hey, thanks, Stevie! (Even though you're blind.)
    
29. If you could go back in time, what would you change?
    The Remedy (I Won't Worry) (Jason Mraz)
    
30. What hurts right now?
    A Thousand Miles (Dave Barnes) - Ouch.
    
31. What will you post this as?
    Rock N Roll McDonald's (Wesley Willis) - Well, if this is the Wesley from #25, then absolutely it makes me cry. From laughing so hard.
    

You be the judge! Episode 1

I answered the phone.

Me: "Company I Work For, our Slogan, this is Whitney, how can I help you?" (my standard greeting)
Man: "Hey, I was just calling to see if y'all were still in business."
Me: (slight pause, short laugh) "Yes, we are, uh, is there someone you need?"
Man: "No, I'd just called some other places down south of y'all, and they weren't in business. So I wanted to call and make sure y'all were still in business before I sent anybody down there."
Me: "OK, let me get our shop counter for you--"
Man: "No, I don't need the shop."
Me: (somewhat confused) "Are you planning to bring in a vehicle?"
Man: "Yep."
Me: "OK, well, you'll need to set up an appointment for it, so let me--"
Man: "No, I don't need an appointment. I'm just sending it in for a steer tire."
Me: "Um, what company are you with?"
Man: (exasperated) "Company A."
Me: "Well, if we can't fit you in on the same day--"
Dial tone.

I managed to hang up the phone's handset instead of doing what I really wanted to do with it, which was bang it repeatedly on my desk. After seething for a minute or two, I picked up the phone again and dialed *69, but the number was unavailable--probably for the best since I had no plan of what to say beyond lots of angry yelling.

I really don't get how people can be so irrationally rude in such banal business situations. But... well, you be the judge!

Random Confession #28

I use odd words in everyday speech without any ironic intent. Sometimes I know when it happens, but I'm sure there are plenty of times I'm totally unaware. Feel free to list examples of odd words you've heard me say--that could be fun for all of us... I'll moderate as needed.

You be the judge! Intro

So I've come up with a way of presenting situations I encounter at work, and I'll be seeing how it works as a new installment on the ol' blog. I'm calling it "You be the judge!" because I'm going to make efforts to present the cold, hard facts of each circumstance, and let you, my reader, decide what you would have done (or, if it's unresolved at the time of posting, what should or could be done even).

These YBTJ posts may, at times, be sort of like giving random confessions about "Workplace Whitney." In other words, they'll likely reveal, for better or worse, how I handle day-to-day things as an office maverick (see link for my job description--you'll have to scroll to the 3rd paragraph). Certainly, though, they'll provide me with a way to vent. I've recently started seeing how detrimental it is for me to bottle up so much of my workplace frustration. Enter: coping mechanism.

I'm hoping to post my first episode of "You be the judge!" tomorrow. Happy Wednesday!

Sensational news stories: The stages of progression

I was reading an online magazine and came across this blurb in relation to the John Edwards mistress/love child story:

I'm assuming we're reaching the next-to-final stage of the natural progression in cases like this: 1) Too horrible and shocking; it can't possibly be true; 2) It's not true; 3) You can't prove it's true; 4) Why are you trying to prove it's true? 5) It's disgusting that you've proved it's true; 6) What's the big deal anyway?

I found it to be hilariously accurate in charting the movement of stories like these in the news. But it's bittersweet hilarity because scandal coverage, in general, makes me queasy. This theoretical "stage" approach points out the typical deceitfulness and hypocrisy of people scandalized in the news.

And there's so much of that. And the stench of it makes me want to barf.